Wednesday, November 7, 2012

~Everybody Chill Out.. I got this~

Said Jesus to His flock.....
Have you heard me?  Are you listening?
Is this anything different from what I have
said all along? 
 It was written long before
even I came before & among you.
Haven't you figured out that the future has already
been written just as the past has already been lived?
Where is your faith?  Where is your cross?
Yes.. THAT cross.  The one you must carry
in order to proceed to get us all where we are going.
 Do I know how heavy that cross is?
Do I know how long and far that destination is with
it carried over your back?
  Splinters you say?
No you can't have the blue one or the green one.
Do you mean to tell me that you honestly believe
that the orange one is any lighter in weight
than your brown one?
How can I ask you to carry it by yourself?
Wait a minute. .. so now you are  demanding Sunscreen?
No it isn't in the plan to make take a
break at that roadside  park.
And please just ditch that GPS cause it won't
be of help at all to where we are going.
I know it says the views are better and the
trip will be shorter.  None the less, the answer
is still
For the last time.. I am not going to answer your
question of are we there yet?
Or how many more miles?
Oh and while we are at it since 
I'm the
leader then I get to select the music I want to
listen to along the way.
I do understand how you do not like my style
of music...
But even so, my trip...
My rules
Yes I am too.  Very thirsty?
No, please share what little water you have with
the others who thirst...
Because I said so....
No, trust me
You will Never run out of water
This I promise to you.
And while we are at it..
I MOST Definitely Do Know How
Heavy that cross is
And the colors really do not matter
No really... for they are all the same
Your splinters? 
Let me show you mine.
Yes you will carry it
But you weren't listening when I told
you that I will help you along the way when it
gets far too heavy and the road too treacherous
Because I LOVE You
More than you will ever know
Please just Trust Me
I have already promised you I know
The Very Best Way
Come along now
We must be going
We have many places to stop
Many people to help
Many people to show
Many people to inspire
They need us to show them
The Way
For we need them to join us
Along our Way


~Bluebonnets in a Texas Fall~

The Bluebonnet is the official state flower of Texas.
It grows wild and permeates our natural landscapes & along our vast roadways
announcing the grand arrival of Spring.
First Lady Bird Johnson established as one of her national
platforms the beautification of our nation w/her wonderful
wildflower planting agenda.  And her legacy previals in all the
gorgeous roadways and byways across all of our diversified states.
The seeds are harvested & sold throughout our state to help us to
colorize our natural environments.  They will regenerate after the season if the birds
do not carry them away and if there is sufficient water for growth.
Seeds from packets can be spread generally during the month of Nov.
in hopes of a vibrant and hearty harvest for the next Spring.
In the late 1990's First Lady of Texas, Laura Bush established an annual
event, The Texas Book Festival so literacy could be placed on the front burner
of the State's agenda.  And it has been a huge success.  Authors, q&a's,
seminars, writer's workshops etc. are the platform for getting attention
for literacy.  One of the highlights is the focus for children and the importance
of reading at an early age.  Kids can meet favorite authors, illustrators, do
crafts and listen to live music.  The event takes place every Fall.  And just
as  Texas First Lady Bird did in the 60's, the seeds to lifelong reading and
literacy were planted in Austin, Texas once a year.  The event
has been a huge success and even went into the national spectrum once
First Lady and President Geroge W. Bush resided in the White House and
promoted literacy and education during the National Book Festival held in
Washington, D.C.
And now we have the Texas Bluebonnet Award in which 20 children's books
are selected by the Texas Library Association into a master list selected for
readers in grades 3-6.  There is a huge variety of books to explore.  They open
these books for review by Texas children to read.  The kids have the final say
after spending the Fall months reading and reviewing these titles.  They get to
use personal discrimination to identify their favorite through a voting process in
the Winter.  One title will be selected to stand out as the favorite once the votes
are counted.  A student is allowed to vote on their favorite after reading 5 books of
their choice.  Parents are also encouraged to share in this adventure and read aloud or
along with their child.  Participation in this program also has rewards for the
students hard work.  If a child reads 5-10 books then they may vote and get a pencil.
If 15 books are read then they will be rewarded w/a vote, pencil and each lunch in
the library.  For those kids who complete all 20 books then they get all fo the above and
also an autographed copy of the winning book or a free book from the Spring Book Fair.
For the size of this blog entry  I will only mention some of our favorites.  And there have so
many WONDERFUL books we have enjoyed.  Big Hoot might have a hard time
picking his favorite.  I won't get to vote but that won't stop me from hooting
about my favorite.  And it's a doozy!!  I will save that one for last.
We were excited to see Zita the Spacegirl on the list.
It was a favorite of Big Hoots as he only read it about
4 times over the Summer... No Really... he did..
I know.. pretty amazing huh?  And I was glad since he
had already read it, that was one less book he had to
handle along w/all his homework projects at his new
magnet school.  I like this book because it features a
girl heroine who finds herself in a mess and is trying to
undo the wrong she unwillingly caused.  (oh how I
can personally relate)  ;p
After all of that action and energy spent trying to get back
home from a planet filled with monsters.. a person
might get hungry.  And what kid does Not like a
hotdog.  Heck, my brother used to plan clandestine
operations raiding the refrigerator for the raw weiners
then running off and chowing down while I was growing up.
(now this is the part where the gag reflex sets in for me)
However, both of my hoots LOVE a good cooked (thank
you God) hotdog!!  So enters .....
a fun and educational source for everything fun,
yummy and fulfilling.  There are tons of historical
references to the foods we eat and the places and in
some cases the reasons they were invented.  You might
want to grab something to eat after reading this one..
or maybe even take in a country fair or two.
After that excursion you find yourself up for more adventure in
the  cute book about postcards and camping adventures.  And let's
face it.. what child doesn't dream about leaving home for an
exploration of the great unknown (or maybe even to jsut leave
home after Mom or Dad gets mad at them and the discover all the
injustices that can be rendered onto a helpless & defenseless and oh
so mistreated kid)???
Here is where I might have to take a serious guess and wonder if
this Like Pickle Juice on a Cookie just might win the vote of Big Hoot.
For there has Never been a pickle (aside from the dreaded sweet variation)
that this hoot has not loved and conquered.  In fact, pickle is one of his
nicknames as it also rhymes w/his last name.  So he did speak highly of
this vingary smelly of a book.
Our next selection is along the lines of boys, screams and all that
goes bump in the night.  And we read it during the week of
Hallowee so what better time.  However, this book can be enjoyed
year round.  It is unlike any kid's book I have read before.  And I Loved it..

Scarum Fair is loaded w/blood, guts, gore and all that is creepy
and macabre.  It has a comical sinister undertone that
throws in just enough humor and lyrical style that keeps you
laughing and turning the page quickly for the next entry.
What boy doesn't get into the not your sugar coated
nice and neat book?  Most are into boogers, snot
and obnoxious noises that can be conjoled from their
body parts & crevices.
 Oh yes.. And guess what?  It's a poetry book!!
Yep.. Can you believe it?  Poetry that the kids will
adore since it's all about creepy, crawly and disgusting
things that you might fear..  Even the ghouls  girls
might get a kick out of this one.
Oohh La La.. there is even one that the girls might
especially be drawn to.  Just Being Audrey is a cute
book about Audrey Hepburn and her childhood.
The illustrations are light, fun and classy... all
the wonderful traits that symbolized the classy
woman and idol she became.
It teaches how you can overcome a very difficult
childhood while surviving a World War.  And how
staying true to yourself and what you believe in
can make a huge difference in the world.  It also
illustrates how one quiet, sweet girl grew up to become
an international star that influenced personal demeanor,
fashion and how we can save lives.. one child at a time.
(oh yes.. and for the girlie girls out there.. it even has BALLET)
And speakin' of dancing.. there is a vibrant book on South American/Latin
dance and music.  I never realized that there were so many different styles of
Latin music & dance. 

Under the Mambo Moon is a great book that explains the origin of the different dances..
the Cha Cha, The Mambo, The Tango etc., the musical instruments used, the beats and
the culture behind style.  I have never really gotten into the hugely popular Dancing With
The Stars TV competition show.  I've have seen it a few times just in passing.  Now, after
having read this morsel of knowledge I want to really Watch it as I now Understand so much
more.  It is a fantastic history lesson, music interpretation and multicultural gem.  This book is
written in an unusual format.  And I have to admit that it took me awhile to finally get to that
"Ah Ha" moment where my mind put the subplots together.  But once I got there, I realized that
I was looking forward to reading it all over again cause there was just so much meat there.
Big Hoot wasn't into this book at first, but it to is a poetry book and he was able to pick up
great nuiances I had missed while I was reading this one to him.
The style, rhythm and vibrant colors makes a special impact in this picture book format.
By the end, Big Hoot was really enjoying it.  It's definitely worth a look through.. especially
if you are into the dance show.  It explains much!!
Ellray Jakes is a comforting and not so comforting book about a boy
who "just wants to get along".. the Rodney King of his Middle School.
However, as we who have survived the Middle School angst and ranks know..
That is waayy easier said than done!!
Especially when you have to deal w/parents who don't understand the torment
you endure on a daily basis from 2 bullies that make your life miserable.  This
 book is a great source of help, understanding, conflict management when dealing
with the horrible and ever growing problem of Bullying.
And Ellray Jakes can be a friend to all who have or are having to deal w/
bullying from mean classmates~
And this is where our bookmark rests for this post.  The next three are some
up & coming..and coming up books we have yet to read....
And now I have saved the BEST for LAST..
My choice for the Bluebonnet Award IF they would
only let Me Vote......(grumble, moan,*sigh..hiss)
And how can you NOT LOVE a book
that's first two hook 'em sentences are
"He was the best of Toms"
"He was the worst of Toms"
And it has my very most favorite ever of all times
And two of my favorite authors of the
Victorian Era....
Charles Dickens & Mark Twain
And an alley cat with one
Major secret he's been hiding
his whole miserable life.....
one little orphaned mouse
accidentally comes across it.....
Anyone who KNOWS me knows I have a passion
for books of any kind.. But my achilles heel is
Children's Lit.
There are hundreds of my favorites.. But once in
awhile, a book comes along that literally just
pushes me over the edge.
Holes, by Louis Sachar did it a few yr. ago.
Honestly, AN"YTHING written by my buddy
Louis is a fine jewel among gems..
And like Holes.. The Cheshire Cheese Cat
has so many different subplots, hidden treasures
and historical info that I got hooked immediately.
This book is witty, wry and wonderful.
And to even imagine Charles Dickens with
major writer's block for an opening hook, line
and sinker is a home run!! 
Will Dickens catch the words he's longing for?
Just what happened to Skilley the Alley Cat
and his sad sad story?
Cause I was gonna read before the Presidential
Elections suckered me in and then
sucker punched the crap out of me.. leaving me
gasping in disbelief.
I'm dying to finish this book ... but it's just so
dang cute that I want to slowly savor it
like a cold fresh wine or a finely aged Cheese!!
Happy Reading!!
Our kids are our future.. and by golly they have
their work cut out for them...


Saturday, October 6, 2012

~Book Review~

There's a great booksite called BookSneeze (Thomas Nelson publisher)that provides free books and in return just asks for a review.  I have been a lifelong reader and so they had me at hello Free.  So I thought, hmm.. that just might be worth a try.  They have alot of books that you can select from so I chose this one awhile back.  And as life often does... it cranked up.. and I got busy and forgot about it.  Yesterday while fighting dust bunnies BEARS it jumped in my hand while cleaning and organizing and screamed "Finish me already".  So lucky me.. I only had a few more pages to read. 

Books are a very personal thing.  Many of my friends and family are voracious readers.  And each one has their own 'niche' or genre that they prefer.  I'm not sure why I selected this book... it's not something I would have normally selected.  But I am very glad I chose it.  It was published last year and written by William J. Bennett & Seth Leibsohn.  And they did a pretty darn good job of opening my eyes and now my ears to our current turmoil. 

If you love freedom, liberty and the freedom to pray to the God you choose and pretty much anything that Western Civilization has to offer, then I honestly think you might be wise to check out this book.  You don't have to be a Republican, Democrat, Libertarian, Independent, conservative, liberal, tree hugger, Christian, Jew, Buddhist, Hari Krishna, Agnostic or any other __________ to need to be aware of where our country stands on the issue of our enemy.  This book illustrates how our govt. has sugar coated, sidestepped and downplayed the severity and degree to which extremist Muslems want all of Western Civilization dead/or under their rule.  And dead will pretty much have to do..since most folks will not/can not live under brutal Sharia Law.

While our country is continuing to ban harsh terms/definitions of our enemies, downplay their motives and egg walk for fear of "offending" Muslems... The jihadists are perfecting and planning their means for future attacks to obliterate Western society.  Their earlier attemps w/foreign soil bombings, The USS Cole incident and other terroristic plots have pretty much received little backbone or force from the U.S. .  9-11 on the other hand got our attention.  However, the authors show the lack of seriousness in our efforts to contain them further is illustrated.  I'm not sure if it's just a head in the sand approach, the let's pretend that this will never happen, or ?... I am finding it very difficult to understand how they have continued to underestimate the level of destruction the jihadist's are plotting.  This book will make you look at the issue and ask your own questions.

And the importance of our Nov. Presidential elections, Iran being only months away from completed nuclear missiles/bombs, the direct threat of Iran issuing a call to annilate Israel and other world events heating up right now should raise every American citizen's flag at attention.

The book is well written and points out some issues I was not aware of.  But I am listening now.  And we should be demanding answers to insure that our govt. is upholding its primary role of protecting us from foreign threats.  And eye opener that should help instigate some great discussions.

Oh yea.. And if you like to read & like FREE then head over to BookSneeze and try them out.  I have a button down the right hand side of this blog to get you there.

Sunday, April 22, 2012

~~For My Teacher Hoots~~

I am the proud product of very dedicated and professional educators. And I am most proud that they taught me the value of a good education (whether formal or not). It has been a wonderful experience to read and listen to the stories and impact that past students have commented on to my folks and the lessons and impact their selfless dedication had on their lives. To teach is to sacrifice much. More than most others. And I was recently sharing with a friend a childhood memory of mine. We were discussing how we often have trouble remembering our kids names while in the presence of cousins. This is esp. true for us parents who had nieces and nephews long before our own kids came along. We were discussing how we were so attached to those kids that we often slip up and call ours by the wrong name.. and it's embarrassing as a generation has passed. I then shared how my sweet Mama would often teach well over 100 students everyday. And by the time we all got home.. she was so exhausted that she could never get our names right. It became fodder as she ran down all the sibling names except for the correct one.. Then settling on the dog's name.. Oh yes.. and on more than one occassion. =D
Ok.. so you will probably notice the pix have nothing to do w/my topic.. But my Blogger site is running all my text together.. so please bear with me and enjoy the photos of random nothingness... So I hold our teachers and educators up with the highest of esteem and gratitude for thier dedication. And let's face it... YOU get far more out of my own kids than I can. When you tell my K to go home, find a quiet place and rest for 30 minutes.. I'll be damned..SHE DID IT. So she would be rested before her 3 Piggy Opera play that evening. And when you tell her to eat better foods, then they follow through and advice me of what to buy while at the grocery store. You guys are really onto something. I do have one simple request.. Will you please send a major directive on the importance of keeping a clean and straightened room? I might even pay you for that one to increase your take home pay.
So I thought of all my many educator friends when I ran across the following on ways to save money.. And all the places you can go that will reward and acknowledge the sacrifices of our teachers. Some of these are really good.. So I thought I would share.. And again.. Thanks so much for all you do.. The seams of our country are stitched with your love, guidance and sacrifice.
Bookstores: 1. Barnes & Noble – B&N Educator Program: 20% off list price & up to 25% off during Educator Appreciation Days. See our Barnes & Noble Coupons page for other savings. 2. Book Warehouse – Educators’ Book Club: 15% discount. 3. Books-a-Million (in-store only) – 20% off for faculty 4. Borders– Classroom Discount Card: 25% off. See our Borders Coupons page for other savings. 5. Half Price Books – Teacher & Librarian Discount Card: 10% off
Online School Supply & Teacher Discount Stores: 1. Academic Superstore – Discounted classroom supplies. See our Academic Superstore Coupons page for other savings. 2. Creative Teaching Press – Sales on various products 3. Discount School Supply – Discounted classroom supplies. See our Discount School Supply Coupons page for other savings. 4. ETA/Cuisenaire– Outlet Store – up to 75% discount on classroom supplies 5. Software Express – Discounts of up to 75% from a variety of publishers, requires a teacher ID and email from the principal 6. Teacher Deals – Teaching supplies at 20-50% off everyday 7. Teachers’ Discount – Discounted classroom supplies 8. Teacher eBooks Now – Features a “deal of the day,” discounted downloadable e-books 9. The Teacher Store at – Up to 50% off deals and sales 10.– Gain credits toward future purchases, get 2% of all purchases made by people you refer to the site.
Retail School Supply Stores: 1. A.C. Moore – Teacher Discount Program: mail in information to get discount card 2. Big Lots – Teacher Appreciation Day on August 13, 2011. See our Big Lots Coupons page for more savings. 3. The Container Store – Organized Teacher Discount Program: 15% off. See our Container Store Coupons page for other savings. 4. Crayola– Gold Star Teacher program: Discounts from & opportunities to test/provide feedback on new products & lesson plans. See our Crayola Coupons page for other savings. 5. FedEx Office – National Educators Discount Program: 15% off 6. Home Depot (in-store only) – Teachers pay no sales tax with tax exempt paperwork 7. Jo Ann Fabrics – 15% off with school ID 8. Kmart– Various teacher-exclusive savings. See our Kmart Coupons page for other savings. 9. Lowes (in-store only) – Teacher’s pay no sales tax with tax exempt paper work 10. Michael’s – 15% off with school ID 11. MPM School Supplies – 10% off for teachers on their first purchase. 12. Office Depot– Star Teacher Program: 10% back in rewards on ink, toner, & paper; 1% back on almost everything else; 15% off copy & print orders. See our Office Depot Coupons page for other savings. 13. Office Max – MaxPerks Rewards for Teachers: $10 reward for every $75 spent. See our Office Max Coupons page for other savings. 14. Staples– Teacher Rewards Program: 10% back in rewards on most purchases. See our Staples Coupons page for other savings. 15. Room Store Furniture (in-store only) – 10% off with school ID
Clothing Stores: 1. Ann Taylor Loft – Loft Loves Teachers: 15% off. See our Ann Taylor Loft Coupons page for other savings. 2. Banana Republic (In-store only, *call store to confirm)- 10% off with employee ID. See our Banana Republic Coupons page for other savings. 3. Club Monaco (In-store only): 20% off for students 4. Eddie Bauer – 15% off on regular priced merchandise in-store with valid student ID 5. J. Crew (In-store only) – valid at outlet locations as well: 15% off with employee ID. See our J. Crew Coupons page for other savings. 6. NY & Co. (In-store only, *call store to confirm)- 15% off with employee ID. See our NY & Co. Coupons page for other savings. 7. The Limited (In-store only) – 15% off with pay stub or teacher ID card. See our The Limited Coupons page for other savings. 8. Aerosoles - 15% off for teachers who are members of The National Education Association. See our Aerosoles Coupons page for other savings.
Technology: 1. Adobe– Heavy Discounts (25-75% off retail) via Adobe Teacher & Student Store. See our Adobe Coupons page for other savings. 2. Apple Store – 5-10% via’s Edu Store for Faculty, Staff, Students. See our Apple Store Coupons page for other savings. 3. AT&T– Usually around 19% off your monthly bill. Varies by educational institution – need to enter work/school email address for discount eligibility 4. Best Buy (in-store only) – Will honor other manufacturer discounts; up to individual store. See our Best Buy Coupons page for other savings. 5. Bose– Educators Direct Group: special pricing for US Educators only on certain items; have to call the Customer Focused Development Team (1-800-353-4207). See our Bose Coupons page for other savings. 6. CampusTech – Discounts on software & technology products 7. Dell – Dell University – savings vary by college (offer high school discounts too). See our Dell Coupons page for other savings. 8. Gradware– Discounts vary, good for student or teachers, just online 9. HP– Up to 10% off via Academic Purchase Programs. See our HP Coupons for other savings. 10. – Faculty pricing – varies by school 11. Lenovo– 5% off. See our Lenovo Coupons page for other savings. 12. PBS– PBS Teachers program: sign up to receive 10% discount on next purchase at ShopPBS for Teachers 13. – School sales & discounts: 10% discount on all orders over $100 14. Sony– Eye on Education Program: various pricing discounts, financing solutions, & trade-in programs. See our Sony Coupons page for other savings. 15. Verizon– Employee Discount Program: varies. See our Verizon Coupons page for other savings. 16. AT&T – Offers a 15% teacher discount on monthly bills in most states. This discount, however, varies state to state, so be sure to call your local AT&T store to confirm.
Travel: 1. Educators Bed & Breakfast Travel Network – Members can get discounted travel at $40 per night for 2 people; Home Stays with other members of the EBBN 2. Explorica– Book trips & join Extra Rewards program: chance to attend an international teacher convention for free 3. Sta Travel – Discounts vary 4. Student Universe – Discounted group airfares for students & faculty members (groups of 12+) 5. Teachers Travel Web – B&B and home exchange for members worldwide 6. Vacations To Go – Cruise discounts – vary by cruise line & availability 7. Walt Disney World Swan & Dolphin Hotels – Teacher/education staff discount – have to check rates & availability. See our Disney Coupons page for other savings. 8.– Discounted rates for teachers 9.– Educator Subscription Discounts: up to 50% off regular magazine subscription rates. 10. National Geographic – Teachers are eligible for discount on Geographic Project kits; Have to email info to receive additional info about discounts 11. Time Magazine for Kids – School-wide volume discounts (from 10-99 to 300+) 12. Marriott Hotels – Discounts vary. Show your ID and say you’re a local government employee.
Miscellaneous: 1. Art Institute of Chicago – Free admission for teachers with valid ID 2. Boston Children’s Museum- Free admission for teachers with valid ID; discount at museum store 3. Field Museum of Chicago- Free admission for teachers with valid ID 4. Gulf Breeze Zoo in Florida- Free admission for teachers with valid ID 5. Free educational DVD to teachers grade 6-12 on their birthday. 6. My Corporate Logo – 15% off custom logo design (code: bWNsMDAx) 7. NEA (National Education Association) – Various NEA member benefits & discounts 8. Regal Theaters: in-theater only, *depends on theater, usually 25% off 9. Replace My Contacts – 5% off an order of $100 or more 10.– Various discounts for NEA members/AFT members/Non-Union teachers 11. Teachers’ Insurance Plan – Special savings on car insurance for active & retired education professionals 12. U.S. Department of Housing & Urban Development – Good Neighbor Next Door Program: up to 50% discount on the list price of homes 13. PETCO– Free aquarium for select teachers with application (PETCO only gives this aquarium to a set number of teachers each year) 14. Pizza Hut (in-store only): 10%-20% off depending on the store with a teacher I.D. 15. Scholotsky’s (in-store only): 10% off with school ID 16. Visible Changes – 10% off with school ID. Just show your ID the first time you get your hair cut there. 17. Ben Franklin Crafts- 10% off every Tuesday with teacher ID. 18. Shedd Aquarium in Chicago – Free general admission with teacher ID. On the Shedd Aquarium page that is hyperlinked here, scroll down to “Other Discounts” to find out more information. Do you know of any additional discounts for teachers? Please comment below and we will add them to our list. Looking for a printable version of this list? Click the link below and hit the “Print” button in your browser. Teacher Discounts: 83 Stores Offering Discounts for Teachers & Educators (PDF, 216KB) If you like these online coupon tips, sign up for Brad’s Daily Alerts today to be notified automatically of new posts! Read more:

Friday, April 6, 2012

It's Almost Naptime!!: Better me than you

It's Almost Naptime!!: Better me than you: Because I am barefoot 99% of the time, and because we aren't the neatest house on the block, the incident of stepping on sharp, pointy ...

Thursday, April 5, 2012

~Holy Frijoles (free-ho-leez)...Egg Slide Shuffle~~

~~ Holy Frijoles!! What a crappy week~

.. No I mean a collossal horrific week... one to forget cause it was just too overwhelming.One where you just can't fathom it getting any worse? Found out we owe Uncle Sam a big chunk of change, a new truck cause the work truck died while on the job and big jobs that aren't paying very fast while the bills are piling up. Feels like a ticking bomb...

Big Hoot is my science/math fella and has the natural born ability to come up with the zaniest and most convincing (in his mind) set of percentages/figures this side of the sun. He is in fact our very own Cliff Claven. And I honestly wonder what the odds are of all this stuff happening a this moment.

Big Hoot was sick and stayed home. Only to find out he wasn't really That sick and was capable of driving me nuts while Little Hoot was slaving away at school. I was blessed with Another debilitating migraine. I am about as good at clocking their frequency as my labor instructor was sharing how often the pain breaks would come during childbirth. Hello Mother Earth Birkenstock instructor.. I'm still waiting on those contraction breaks. Cause with 2 inductions & that evil pitocin drug that never happened! Just as these headaches are hitting. The Mega Lotto hit almost a billion $$ last wk. Had I won, the first thang I woulda done was run to my neurologist and beg her to stab me with those botox needles in my head for relief. And I don't like needles. But I do cherish the ability to raise my head off a pillow every now and then.

My head is throbbing and I somehow remember in my painful fog that I need to thaw out some meat from the freezer in the garage for supper. I trudge to the door and open it. The smell hit me immediately. Had I been smarter, I would have said "Delivery tonight for supper", slammed the door and left well enough alone. But, I didn't. Instead I look down and see the most disgusting purple & bloody liquidy mess on the floor. And the freezer door was open.. a package of steak had fallen and caused the door to stay open. I could have cried. After weeks of diligently shopping sales to stock up that thing.. and it was almost a complete loss. And I woulda cried had if head was not already performing a percussional performance.

So I set out with bleach, bucket and mops and begin the process of cleaning this tragic mess. Along with the nasty soured blood there were HUGE bags of blueberries and mixed berries that had tumped over. And all I could think about was.. "Ok.. Jesus this would be a most wonderful moment for you to decide to come back to earth". "No really, I mean Right Now!" "I'm oh so ready".

I thought I was a very bright chick when I read how you can freeze uncooked eggs. And the healthy market I frequent had a marvelous sale on organic eggs. So I bought 8 dozen..cause hey.. for $1.88/doz. was a remarkable sale. And I'm thinking I'm a remarkable and smart chick so I will stock up.
Only to find that all the Hoots howled when they ate the cooked eggs. Something bout the nasty consistency. So I didn't even bother taking them out of the ice cube trays and putting them into freezer bags. To hell with them. The egg hasn't been my friend since my first pregnancy. It nauseated beyond belief to the pt. I had to banish them until Big Hoot was born. Just the smell of an egg cooking can still make me gag even today. Not all the time.. but on most days.

I'm working really hard trying to clean up this God awful mess. I'm gagging, my head is killing me and my body is dizzy. What a sight I was. I'm almost finished when I decided to bring the ice cube trays w/the thawed and stinkin' eggs into the house and into the dishwasher. And I Almost made it. Until my foot missed the step and all those slimey trays came crashing down on me and all over that concrete floor. I only Thought I wanted to cry and scream for Jesus to return before This happened. What was I thinking. Silly me. that was nuthin' compared to this new mess.

So I'm scooping, and gagging.. scooping and gagging. And I couldn't even touch my head if I wanted to. And then a movie/book scene flashed into my mind in which I could relate.

And this gem of work. The scene where Vivienne (Ashley Judd) is overwhelmed beyond belief when all five young kids get a virus and the first one comes in the room and tell her he's feeling sick. So she rushed him into the bathroom where he immediately throws up. He's still sick and child #2 enters and she barely gets that one onto the toilet cause of the runs. Then enters #3 where the bathtub is utilized. All the kids are sick and she just wants to die.. right then, right there.. before she loses it..

And so this is how I felt too at this moment while scoopin' up slimey, nasty
and soured egg yolks off that concrete floor. After the last egg yolk was gathered I grabbed my mop and bucket, turned off the light and slammed the door and said "To hell with it!!"

After a very long and very hot shower we proceed to the grocery store so we can use the meat I could salvage. And when we return the kids run off to play while I start putting up the groceries.

2 homemade lasagnas
2 chili mac casseroles
1 tator tot casserole
folled by 1 enchilada casserole

Days before all this madness my cell phone had a little freak accident and ended up in Pooch Hoot's cup of water in my car. And that was the tragic death of my alarm clock, watch and communication tool. RIP little buddy.

The trip to acquire new phones was crazy. And we honestly can't understand why Verizon refused to work a deal that we could both agree upon. We had only been with 'them' since they were that nifty little company called PrimeCo.. that little blobby alien mascot. Heck, we've been with them so dang long most people have not a clue as to what I am referring to. So off to the confusing land of wireless.

I experienced something I never thought would happen. And I can actually say it was all because of my migraine & the fact that too much time had passed and I didn't have my phone as a clock. I scored a DEAL w/an Indian (yes from India or Pakistan or somewhere). It amazes me..and Big Big Hoot!! In my other life many many moons ago, the role was reversed and my customers would drive me insane begging me for better deals and haggling till I wanted to throw up. So yea!! Score one for the migraine. woo hoo~

This is the part when you know the business with the eggs just isn't over. No!! Not ever for this child. I went to put the groceries into the freezer.

Wait for it....

Wait for it...

You know it's coming...

You know it's INEVITABLE

Especially since you already know about my treadmill ordeal at the Y...
June 10th The latest and greatest title

My flip flops hit that floor in all that hideous egg slime and I went flying. But not before dancing this Steve Martinlike slide and scraping
my elbow in two places (and mind you that takes some great talent), scraping my knee and landing hear in all that slime. Both feet hurt and I have a minor sprain in one ankle while the other one aches as well. Oh how the bruises will shine...
However, amazingly my hands never let go that that prized package that was destined for the freezer.

And that my friends is how you do the Egg Slime Shuffle!!

On a side note: To the family or individual who egged our home.. Thanks!!
thank you from the very bottom of my heart and egg slimed britches.
You surprised us and left us with the most delish and coveted choc. candies that arrived in a big Easter egg. That one gesture meant so much to me. It brought smiles, wonder and laughter back into my very crazy week.
(* a giant egg was left at our doorstep with a note explaining we had Been Egged and to go out and egg two other unsuspecting homes) What an adorable and loving gesture!!

And for the record.. I threw a pc of fabric over that damn slime with my precious flip flops encased in that nasty crap and I still have no energy to clean that mess up or reclaim my pride.

Hell.. who am I kiddin'? I lost that pride thing eons ago.
And so you all share in my ridiculous glory
I have discovered that there jsut isn't No End, no foreseeable limit to the ways in which I can completely humiliate and harm myself. Jesus, please come and save me from myself...
No none~~